By Mary Ann Faremouth, CPC
Valentine’s Day is an annual tradition celebrating love. Right after the Christmas holiday, we begin seeing shelves stocked with heart-shaped candies and jewelry, tents set up near grocery stores to sell flowers and advertisements about the perfect gift for the significant person or people in our lives. Lately I’ve been remembering a song by Burt Bacharach that topped the charts back in 1965 called “What the World Needs Now Is Love.” Back in 1965, many events were happening in the United States, including the civil rights movement, the Vietnam War and the space race.
During the past few years, events may have caused many of us to reflect on love in its many different forms. And as a seasoned recruiter, I believe that being in alignment with who we truly are and learning to love ourselves — no matter what is happening around us — is critical. From that very important place, all the beauty and fulfillment in our lives can flow. In our careers, being in alignment with our gifts and talents and being able to give them to the world is a special form of love that can pay dividends. When we value ourselves and own our talents, then we can be the best version of ourselves and also help others along the way.
It all sounds great, doesn’t it? However, where is the starting point? How can we get in touch with our core self, take stock of it and truly nurture and love it?
When I ask myself these questions, I always come back to the first step of the Faremouth Method™, “Do A Self Inventory.” This first step in the process is the most crucial because “Knowing Thyself” is truly what allows you to achieve great things. What do you do if you feel lost and not sure of what that core even is anymore? Have you ever known? Who are you really? Have you changed? What do you truly value and want from your career and your life? If you don’t know who you are, how can you identify and achieve what you desire?
This Valentine’s Day might be the perfect time to hold on to the belief that we deserve to treat ourselves with love and respect, especially with all the changes and challenges we have all endured. Some of us may feel there are parts of ourselves we thought we had lost, and others may feel somewhat invigorated that they now have new beginnings in front of them.
Self-love is essential to our success in life. During challenging times, self-doubt can get in the way of happiness. What does self-love mean? This is love of self in its purest form. It is an examination of what our needs are for us to be our best selves. We need to have that sense of space, purpose and recognition of value. When we ignore our own needs to be the healthiest mentally, spiritually and physically, we do ourselves a major disservice. It’s important to feel that we are the best of who we can be on all levels.
Consider putting your energy into the relationship you have with yourself. Allow yourself to bask in the beautiful brilliance that is you and treat yourself to all of the greatness that you long for and deserve. Try one or a few of these ideas and see which ones resonate with you.
1. Create a positive mantra — We all have an internal recording that we sometimes are not even aware of. Become mindful of your inner voice and guide it to choose positive messages whenever the negativity starts to speak loudly. You might try saying, “I am a person of high worth,” “self-love is my trademark” or “2025 will be my best year ever!”
2. Surround yourself with beauty — Our outer environment can influence our internal condition. Create a space that makes you feel good! Fresh flowers and an organized space can add to the vibe of self-love, peace and relaxation.
3. Investigate methods of hiring and self-growth — Check into classes or seminars online that may enhance your ability to get into better alignment with who you are or who you would like to become. There have been overwhelming demands from a variety of clients in my recruiting practice with the current talent shortage and jobs staying open for weeks on end, turndowns and no-starts. You might find you love your job more if you are open to different methods in your staffing practices or job-search endeavors.
4. Write yourself a love note or begin journaling — Take some time to write down all of the qualities you like about yourself. Release the negativity for this exercise and be determined not to focus on your flaws. Consider this a reprogramming exercise to enhance your self-love and instill hope in your future journey of expansion and growth. For me, writing was a healing exercise after many close family members passed away in a short amount of time. The writing classes I took also allowed me to meet so many interesting people from all over the world as most of the classes were online!
5. Practice small, daily achievable goals — It doesn’t have to be a huge goal, just something that allows you to feel you have implemented a positive practice that is taking you in a direction to enhance self-love. For example, your goal might be to add 15 minutes to your daily walk. Begin a meditation practice upon getting out of bed. Allow time for something that brings you joy and pleasure, such as reading a book, watching a movie or maybe spend less time on social media. Remember, self-love is about giving yourself a gift that you mostly give to others. When you put yourself in the quotient, you have more to give yourself and others.
There are other steps in the Faremouth Method™ that are all designed to help you align yourself in the New Work World. Be a hunter: Don’t accept things as they always have been. Go out of your way to investigate how you can become a part of the future. You don’t have the luxury of waiting for things to come to you. Step out of your comfort zone: Don’t take the easy way, which may have been the old routine. We need to shake things up and challenge ourselves. It’s easy to just do things as we have always done. There comes a time to break out of that rut and find situations that may not be all that comfortable but reap great rewards. If you have been a team player but rarely the leader, reverse it. Become the leader of a team. Ask yourself why you have never been the leader. Perhaps it is self-doubt that stops you from exerting your confidence. You may know more than you give yourself credit for. Consider joining organizations like Toastmasters and Rotary. These organizations have allowed me to grow and contribute to others in ways I had never experienced before!
Make sure this Valentine’s Day you don’t underestimate the power and value of nurturing the relationship that you have with yourself. Self-love breeds confidence, success and joyful moments. With it comes the great power to infuse light and love into every corner of your life and is also the key to creating healthy and meaningful relationships with others. Do what you can to set aside time to honor, love and pamper the amazing, priceless gift to the world that is YOU! When you truly love yourself, you have more to give to others. We can all agree that “What the World Needs Now Is Love.” On Valentine’s Day and beyond, take a loving step to becoming the best version of you so that you can contribute more to the world!
Mary Ann Faremouth
Mary Ann holds a CPC (Certified Personnel Consultant) credential, was certified by the Board of Regents of the National Association of Personnel Consultants in Washington, D.C., and was awarded an Advanced Communicator Bronze, Advanced Leader Bronze Awards by Toastmasters. She cofounded Jobs: Houston magazine in 1997. Mary Ann maintains affiliations with professional organizations, including oil and gas, financial, construction, IT, and structural, mechanical, and civil engineering. (www.faremouth.com)
Mary Ann’s award-winning first book Revolutionary Recruiting has been listed by Book Authority as Number #1 Best 100 Recruiting Books; #1 Best Seller, Non-Fiction, Amazon (2019); Top 20 Recruiting books, Recruitics; Readers’ Choice finalist (2019), Houston Literary Awards; Best Non-Fiction (2018), Best Cover (2019), and Best Self-Help (2018), Authors Marketing Guild. Her books support individuals and corporations, tap into each candidate’s unrealized potential to find the right person for each job, maximizing both employee satisfaction and the employer’s bottom line. Mary Ann showcases her expertise of the recruiting world on a monthly podcast for The Price of Business and weekly articles for USA Business. Her new workbook, Revolutionary Reinvention, was recently released on Amazon. Mary Ann lives in Houston, Texas.
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